Coby

One Slightly Used Boyfriend, Blog; Part 4.

I run every morning, well except for Tuesday mornings due to a late night meeting. And by the time my run and workout are complete the dog-walkers are out in full force.
Well yesterday morning was no exception and as sure as rain there was Coby, my buddy, the Yorkshire Terrier puppy who has bonded with me like no other dog.
Coby has a tiny body but has the heart of a pit bull. His master saw me and said "Coby, who's that?"
And then Coby saw me from about 100 feet away and literally dragged his much larger walker to me in a frenzy. Normally Coby will jump right onto me, licking my face, biting my nose, and pulling at anything (usually my sweat towel) from my fingers to play with. But today would be different as Coby decided he needed a belly rub and I was just the guy to do it!

"Dude, why do you write about dogs so much?"

Because dogs are the source of unconditional love, and puppies especially. I have often had the thought that if people would treat each other like dogs treat each other, especially when first meeting (can you imagine all the butt sniffing?) that everyone would be related and society would move at a much more calm pace.

I dated a woman about 3 1/2 years ago who had a great desire to fly into the arms of the man she loved. So as I picked her up from the airport, in a blinding rainstorm, I stepped out of my car, braced myself, and from about 50 feet away she knew exactly what I was doing.
She dropped her bags, ran as fast as she could and as she got to the curb became airborne, flying about five feet directly into my arms and wrapping her legs around my waist, her hands around my neck, and her heart beating very fast.
I damn near fell on my ass but somehow didn't.
This was serving the needs of a woman I cared for and making one small dream come true for her. We didn't last too long but I can assure you that every man she dates hence will be measured to that standard.

I know, I'm meandering, but the point that I'm attempting to make is that when we put our mate first, when we treat each other like someone who matters, when we show the excitement, the glow, and the love of a puppy for a friend, then, then shall we be able to keep the people who matter the most to us.

Spike

http://www.DeMistyfiedDating.com

Integrity issues

Picky?
Selective?
Non-settling?
Refuse to take the first, or second, or any "semi-compatible partner" because you just KNOW that the "one" who will absolutely knock your socks off is out there and LOOKING for you as well?

Yeah, that's just where I'm at right now.

You too?

So there I was two weeks ago with an adorable blond snuggled up in my lap in the front seat of my car (Dude! At your age?) kissing me in just the right way to elicit a positive response from us both. She fit, I mean she REALLY fit just perfectly in my hungry lap. And the manner in which we were kissing, tasting, caressing, man it was like our mouths were just meant to be together, like they had been doing this for as lifetime....

...sheer bliss...

And then "the look."
You know, the LOOK?
The one that says "if we don't stop RIGHT NOW we'll be upstairs and I'm a professional and my doorman would tell everyone!"

And that was the first date. The second date got closer.
But there were flags, y'know, of the "red variety?" The ones that say to you "not the one for me."
Yes she elicited a passionate response but I'm at the point in my life where I need more, and I just didn't feel "more."

So here's the integrity issue part.

It was clear from her words and ESPECIALLY her actions that the third date would be, well, horizontal. And as much as that drew me in, it also got me to thinking "dude, if you had integrity and REALLY meant what you said then you wouldn't go there with this woman."
And we had a 3rd date tentative for last Saturday.
And 2 nights before she called to say that she was chickening out, that she wasn't ready for "a sleepover."
And I was relieved.
And I was shocked that I was relieved.
And that is SO not who I used to be.
And I told her that I was in no rush and she said "I so knew that you'd understand."


So she stole the decision right out from under me, but I hadn't called her to lock it in and if I did it would have been "sex versus integrity."

And quite frankly, if this cutiepie had pressed the issue, I have a feeling that integrity may just have taken a back seat to all night sex.

And that is soooo not who I want to be.

Spike

Is dating still a mystery to you?

So I had just finished watching an old Star Trek episode with my son (A Piece of the Action!) on this very computer when I remembered that I promised my partner Tony that I would post an ad/blog here tonight.

So as I began to write the content you will see below, some woman from Florida decides to I.M. me on MySpace. I didn't even know I was logged on as I rarely go to that old profile. I did not remember her but it's always nice to be polite, even at 1:30 in the morning!
I will cut and paste our very short exchange for you to see and then write my comments.

It follows:

her: thank you so much for the kind words so many days ago. They have always stayed with me, and made me realize that what I said is sometimes, understood.

me: Kind? Meeeee???? Awwwww, really?

her: do you remember the nice comment?

me: I am in the middle of blogging right now for my business, so please dear, refresh my memory!

her: sorry, i will let you go...

me: I was not trying to go, I was simply asking for you to refresh my memory...

And then she just logged off!!!!

Now, in retrospect, could my "business blogging" comment have been perceived as a brushoff?
I mean after all, I DID ask her to refresh my memory?
Perhaps if I had just said "thank you" it may have sufficed?
Or, was this woman just setting herself up for failure, assuming for no good reason that I was, indeed "brushing her off?"
Maybe she's just a lonely woman, and perhaps dating and men are a "mystery" to her?

Seems to be a lot of that going around! And that's why Tony and I have created "Dating DeMistyfied." The "flyer" below was created by us today with the help of a brilliant, young marketing guy.

Please read it and post your comments as we'd really love to hear your opinions (despite the fact that, at this hour my eyeballs are nearly falling out!).

Spike!


Women, do you know what motivates men to wanna talk to you?

Men, do you?

It may NOT be what you think!

It may NOT be what you feel!

It may not even BE ON YOUR RADAR!

At the Dating DeMistyfied Workshops you'll deeply get how the other sex feels, what attracts them TO YOU, and what works best about YOU!

Come join us!

www.datingdemistyfied.com