Sunday, August 28, 2011

Hurricanes, football, and lessons 101.

So we survived Hurricane Irene here in New York. It was windy and rainy and muggy and I discovered something that I already knew, that nature is amazingly beautiful. And I didn't ride it out alone; no not alone at all. I had two of my closest friends here with me, guy friends, men that I admire and who admire me. Men that I would take a bullet for.

So we shopped and cooked and ate and played football in the rain and taped windows and hung plywood and 2X4's and watched movies and did guy stuff all weekend long. We had meetings about our lives and deep discussions and bonded.
We ate all my munchies and I got a ton of work done on my workshop.
And we did something else too,
we fought,
we sniped,
we got pissy-assed and did not always show each other the love and respect that we all know that we feel for one another.

And therein lies the challenge for men and women.

If 3 men who are best friends can't get along well for a mere 48 hours cooped up together, what chance do men and women have who are trying to be together, to build a life together, and to love one another unconditionally?
Y'see as men, and powerful, confident men at that, we clean up very quickly when we have a disagreement and move on to more important things.

But when men and women fight we sometimes tend to fight dirty, bring up the past. Sometimes men will lose it and scare their women into submission. Sometimes women will lose it and guilt their men into shameful feelings about themselves.

Mature, masculine men will not engage their women in battle, but women similarly need to learn when to settle down and allow their men to "go to their cave" until they are of a mindset to discuss, and not fight, often about something quite silly.

Loving someone for life is probably one of the most difficult things a person can do, yet nothing is more valuable, more fulfilling, or more important than love.

All you need is love.

I heard that somewhere.

Thanks John.


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