I had a feeling that title would grab you!
But it may not be exactly what you think!
Several workshops ago we were going through an exercise where the men were "hitting on" the women, attempting to "pick them up."
It was a lot of fun for everyone involved, well, once the "angst" of approaching the opposite sex dissappeared.
When we debriefed the men after the exercise the answers were pretty much as expected, but the women were all in agreement on one point. This point blew Tony and I away as we were completely unaware of this being the truth.
As the men approached the women, the women were in their heads thinking "will I be picked?"
"Will I be selected by a man, even in this controlled environment? Or will I just be standing here feeling like a complete ass and loser?
What is wrong with me?
Do I have what it takes to attract a man?
Why isn't anyone coming over to...... oh, here comes one now!!!!!! And he's cute!!!!"
SELECTION ERECTION TIME!!!!!!
Yeah, I said it, female erection, so sue me.
I had no idea that women experience the level of self deprecation, discomfort, and even dread that they just will "not be selected" in a social environment.
Now, I do understand that the Cindy Crawford look alikes may not go through all of this, having been hit on fourteen thousand times that day alone, but the rest of the women?
Now to the "erection" part. When the women were approached (now listen closely) by a man that they wanted to be approached by, who may have pased them by before, there was a level of anticipation and excitement that we call "The Selection Erection."
Who woulda thunk it?
So we learned two valuable lessons:
One: Women are just as nervous and unsure in social situations than men are.
Two: Despite the occasional attitude, women DO desire to be approached by you!
Of course there are caveats to all of this, but after all this is a blog, so we'll just stay basic!